Did you know, that when a baby is born, his brain is ½ the size of an adult brain? By the time he is 3 years old, his brain has grown to 80% size of an adult brain. This is incredible growth, in just 3 years.

How does the brain work, and how can we foster this development?

Within the brain are billions of nerve cells, known as neurons. The neurons have to connect with other brain cells in order to work. Some of these connections are present from birth – for example, the ability to breathe, to suck, to cry, and others occur as the baby grows and develops. The connections occur when experiences or skills are repeated over and over.

For example you don’t learn how to fly a plane with just one lesson – you need multiple opportunities to practise in order to be competent. Babies are the same - in order to learn to walk, or stack blocks or feed themselves – it doesn’t happen with just one instruction from us. This is why a young baby will drop toys (or food!) over the high chair repeatedly. Parents often think that the child doesn’t want the object. What the baby is learning, is when I drop this book, it goes bang, and when I do it again, it still goes bang. When I drop the orange it rolls away, sometimes it rolls left, sometimes right… they are looking to make the connection (in their brain) between action and response. Once they’ve dropped the book often enough, then they no longer need to do it, because they know it will go bang.

Whilst our skulls are hard, the brain within is fragile, and like glass, it can be easily damaged. This is why we need to ensure proper care of the brain, especially in the early months, when baby’s neck muscles are not yet strong, and they struggle to hold up that heavy head. Babies should never be shaken, as their fragile brain bangs against the inside of the skull and can lead to death or serious permanent damage of the brain and it’s function.

We also need to protect babies and children’s brains, by ensuring that they are securely placed in car seats, and later, wear helmets whilst bicycling.

Brain development is also fostered by diet. In order for those connections (known as synapses) to be strong in the brain, they need a protective coating of myelin. The myelin coating enables the brain cells to function more efficiently. Myelin occurs naturally in breast milk, and is added to formula milk. For this reason, formula milk should always be made up according to the directions (not diluted), to ensure the baby receives the correct amount of myelin.

Another thing which fosters healthy brain development, is to limit screen time. It is well documented, that TV, because of the fast moving images, affects the developing neural pathways. When these babies grow, they seem to require constant activity as they’ve grown to see this activity as the norm. Many Paediatric services now recommend no screen time before the age of 2 years of age, and less than 2hrs per day for ages 2+, due to the effects on the developing brain. I hear your shock…. what will I do with them? Think back to your childhood – more walks in the park, or playing in the backyard, digging in the garden, cooking with Grandma, craft work, collecting leaves and snails etc.

It does make you wonder, doesn’t it, with the huge increase in children on medication for ADHD, the children who have poor social skills and the children who have no impulse control, which we’ve seen increase dramatically over the past 20 years, since we have had more screens in the household – be they TV, DVD, computer, X-box etc – makes you wonder….

Being a parent is a huge responsibility, which includes, as far as possible, doing everything we can do to nurture that precious developing brain.

Happy Parenting!

Music for babies begins when you first coo to them, or when you are rocking them to sleep whilst humming, or singing a quiet, gentle lullaby. Babies have even heard your music in utereo, including the ‘music’ of your beating heart!

Parents often sing little songs or rhymes to them whilst changing their nappy or bathing them – reciting ‘This little piggy went to market’ or entertaining a young child with ‘Round and round the garden’, on their hand. Music is such a great connecting mechanism between the parent and child. Music provides comfort, familiarity, physical closeness, anticipation and often laughter.

There are four components to music: singing, listening, dancing and playing.

Here’s how you can help your child to learn….

Singing: Sing lullabies eg ‘Rock-a Bye Baby’ or ‘Mockingbird’ and nursery rhymes such as ‘Twinkle, Twinkle little Star’, or ‘Baa, Baa, Black Sheep’. Include the actions, and even young babies will start to really watch your movements and your excitement, and will soon join in for some of the actions, and maybe part of the words. Toddlers love songs such as ‘Old MacDonald’ where they play an active role in choosing the next animal, and joining in for the chorus.

Listening: This is such an important skill to teach our children. Children may hear you, but may not always listen! We start to teach our babies to listen by using our voice expressively when we greet them, or are talking with them. We give them rattles to shake, and bells which ring. Often we have music in the house and children get to hear what is playing. Take care that the volume is not too loud for them. We also encourage listening by sometimes having both the TV and the music off, and then pointing out the sound of the birds chirping outside, or the distant sound of the postmans’ bike approaching. This really encourages the child to tune in to the sound(s).

When you play music, play a variety…. It can be anything from children’s music to Mozart! By listening to different styles children get to hear the instruments, rhythms and beat.

Read books with rhyming verse and repeated phrases as it encourages participation with it’s rhythm.

Dancing: I remember clearly as a 6 year old, standing on my Daddy’s feet, while he ‘danced’ me around the room, while he sang "You are my sunshine" – such a beautiful memory. Dance with your children, both by holding them on your hip as a baby or toddler, or on your feet with older children. Later dance along side with them, and show them some of your best moves! Have fun doing this – you are creating memories. Let the child choose which music they’d like to play, and what type of dancing is going to be best here.

Playing: Playing musical instruments is such fun! It’s great to have ‘proper’ ones, but you can start off by making simple musical instruments yourself. Fill empty, clean plastic take-away containers with a variety of items – dried beans in one, raw rice in another, cotton tips in another one. Place the lids on and use strong tape to seal them (small items can be a choking hazard). Show your child how to shake them and talk about the loud and soft sounds. Two empty cardboard rolls (from lunchwrap) can be used as tapping sticks, and a wooden spoon and empty plastic container upside-down makes a great drum! You can also use a metal saucepan - but this is only recommended if you can cope with the volume! Sing songs with your child, and play along on the instruments you created together.

Happy musical parenting!

This week I needed to purchase some new toys for a Playgroup I run. ‘That’s easy’, I thought, as I headed to the nearest toy store. The various Parenting Consultant positions I’ve held over the past 14 years have all come with fully set up rooms. So, it’s been a long time since I’ve been in a toy store! Frankly, I must say that I was horrified at the sexism and consumerism I was confronted with. Aisles and aisles of pink toys for girls and blue/ green for boys. And, the vast majority of toys had TV/ movie characters on them as logos. Is this what we want for our children - to be pigeon holed into gender based stereotypes, and to be on the consumer trail from 2 years of age?

The pink, ‘girl stuff’’ was basically projecting images of a demure, delicate, gentle child, and many toys were of a domestic nature. The ‘boy toys’ projected toughness adventure and, with bold or military colours.

This push towards ‘girly pink’ or a ‘baby blue’ for boys, begins at birth. No, actually, it begins prior to birth when many parents want to know the gender of the child so that they can decorate the room pink or blue. (And yes, I know there are many other reasons why parents want to know the gender). Then once baby arrives often gifts are received, and again the parents have the gender of the child defined by colour , with pink and blue as predominate.

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I had a mini-holiday recently, in a beautiful little seaside town. Daily I would walk to the beach, to absorb the sunshine and heat, as well as hear the sounds of the waves crashing, and the smell the scent of the sea and the bush surrounds.

On the beach were so many families from India, Asian, the Middle East and Anglos. There were Mums with kids, families with cousins & Grandparents, group of friends, surfers, and couples walking hand in hand.

What they all had in common, was a day of fun. There were so many smiles and the sound of laughter, and it was wonderful to participate in this event.

It made me reflect on all the amazing messages which were intentionally and unintentionally being shared with the children present.

They were messages about:

So many amazing lessons on the beach – many of them unspoken messages, but equally absorbed by the children.

We expose our child to these sort of spoken and subtle messages whichever environment they are in – be it the beach, the supermarket or movie theatre. It helps children to learn the ‘rules’ of their environments and our society, through us as parents, and by the others who use the same space.

Happy learning one and all!

This morning over breakfast I was listening to the radio, and was aware how the different pieces impacted on me – some more upbeat, some more gentle and calming. I don’t know about you, but I play different types of music for specific moods – if I’m feeling a bit ‘flat’ I put on something like “Pink”, and if I’m feeling hassled, I put on gentle classical music, or “Enya”. We can utilise this with children too – you can use music to enhance their moods, to help ‘lift’ them when needed, or to calm them at other times.

From an early age we use lullabies to soothe our babies, and often sing them to sleep – this is true whatever your cultural background. It’s the tone of your voice, which settles them. As they get older, they like things with a stronger beat – you’ll often see toddlers bopping to a beat. Toddlers also like nursery rhymes and songs, and will join in with the words and actions. Even a 1 year old will often wave their hands in the  air, to “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star.”

So How Does Music Benefit Your Child?

Socially: Children have fun with music – to sing, to play instruments, to dance, to join in with the actions. They derive a sense of achievement in participating, which is great for their self-esteem.

Physically: Joining in with music through dance provides opportunity for Gross Motor (large muscle) development, and spatial awareness (learning ‘their’ space, and how not to bump into others). Certain musical instruments also promote fine motor co-ordination, through playing with them eg piano type instruments. Playing instruments also promotes hand-eye co-ordination, and listening skills.

Emotionally: Happiness, enjoyment and confidence building are positive emotional benefits which are enhanced through music.

Intellectually: Music helps to develop their imagination, creativity and a sense of rhyme.

Language: Learning new words, and the sequence of words are developed through singing.

Where do I start?

When you notice young babies moving to music, comment on it and join in with them – there often much laughter and smiling!

Put on music and dance with your child – they often like to do this in front of a mirror so that they can watch themselves.

Do mood dancing – toddlers often really enjoy if you show them how to dance pretending to be happy or cranky, or sad – allowing different emotions to be explored. Also dance fast and dance slow. And children love standing on your feet, and allowing you to waltz them around the room!

Help children to develop an awareness of sound comes from you pointing out noises to babies and toddlers – ask if they can hear the clock ticking, or the postmans bike – ie alerting them to sounds and the skill of listening. This is why it’s important to have the TV off regularly, so that children can tune their ears in to more subtle sounds.

What instruments?

You can buy instruments, or make your own version of them – toddlers and children will enjoy joining in with this. There are many suggestions via the internet.

Babies enjoy bells, ‘soft’ maracas, tambourines, and of course – saucepans and a wooden spoon to bang on them!

Toddlers enjoy the same, plus drums, and keyboard type instruments.

And, the relationship to Maths…

The Maths and music centres in the brain are close together. It’s not quite understood, but children who have lots of music in their lives tend to do better in Maths subjects at school than those who don’t.  So, put on the music and sing and dance!

Remember, that music belongs to everyone, and that enthusiasm is more important than ability!

Play is children’s ‘work’. When children are playing, they are learning valuable information.  This poem summarises it:

The Value of Play

Play is fun.
Play comes from within. Children love to play.
Play is an important part of healthy development.
Play is enjoyable and doesn’t need careful planning, or an end result.
Play means active involvement, not just watching.
During play, the child sets the rules, and there is no right or wrong way to play.
During play children practise physical skills and learn about their bodies.
They learn to use their imagination.
They learn about their own feelings and the feelings of others.
They learn about the world around them using all five senses.
Play is the work of children!

Through play children learn:

To explore materials
To be creative
To use language
To share (maybe!)
To make decisions
To test possibilities
To estimate
To concentrate
and so much more!

Children need the time to explore through play - by playing alone, with other children, and with you. Each of these relationships are important!

In the first 12 months, play involves rattles and listening to your voice; watching you move about the room, or the dog running in the garden; playing with their toes. Babies like to bang wooden spoons on saucepans, and to pull things out of the laundry basket (clean or not!), and to play peek-a-boo!

From 1 -2 years, toddlers like to play with dolls or teddies, and to help you make the bed, to play in sand or water, with empty containers. They love to stack objects and to open and close drawers and doors, and to climb in and out of cardboard grocery boxes. Toddlers love playing chasings, drawing with crayons and collecting stones or sticks when out walking.

At 2 -3 years, children often like messy play with sand and water, or shaving cream spread on a table. They love to walk , run and climb, and to join in when you wash the car or cook a cake. Toddlers like pasting objects onto paper and taking them off again, to play dress-ups with your clothes and shoes, and to sort out cars and animal toys into different boxes.

3-4 year olds like pretend play – to be a shopkeeper, a doctor or a mechanic. They like to help you water the garden and wash the dishes. They often like to paint and to see that you display their artwork. Young children like to jump and to throw and catch a ball. They can learn to use scissors and to make paper chains or to thread beads onto string. They like to 'read' you the story from the book, and to talk a lot!

You’ll notice that many of the activities listed don’t involve expensive toys – most are with items you have around the house, and having your participation is what children really want! It's pretty easy to include children in the jobs you have to do around the home - washing, cleaning, cooking, hanging clothes out on the line, or weeding the garden - give them a small task to do and praise them as they attempt to do it..... just watch them swell with pride!

If you can make time (even small amounts) to play with your children every day, not only with they be learning skills and developing, they are also forming a positive relationship with the most important person in their world – You! When playing with young children, let them 'lead' the play ie ask them what they'd like you to do with the building blocks, or what they'd like you to draw with the crayons. This teaches them that there are some things which they can choose and control, and at other times Mum or Dad chooses.

Remember play is about fun and learning - smile, laugh, show and embrace this experience together....

Happy Playing!

Many of you will have heard this term before, in relation to opportunities which come our way. The idea being to grab the chance to do ‘xyz’ now, because the opportunity is only available for a short time.

Did you know that there are windows of opportunity in relation to children and their development?

For babies and young children this is when it is optimal for learning to occur in a certain developmental domain, because the conditions are ripe for learning. It means there is a time when it is easier to learn or develop that area. Let me give you an example using animals.

Whilst researching this using young birds, a patch was applied to one eye by scientists, thereby preventing that eye from ‘learning’ to see. It was left there for some weeks. When the patch was removed the still healthy eye was unable to see, as the neural pathway in the brain had not developed, and the bird was effectively blind in that eye. The time for learning or developing that skill had passed. (I add here I am not in favour of animal testing!)

In developing children there are optimal times for learning in the various developmental areas. If learning doesn’t occur during that time and a strong neural connection made in the brain, then it is much more difficult to learn later. If you imagine nature opens a window in the brain and allows air in (‘air’ here means learning), for a certain period. And then nature closes it or lowers it – it is more difficult for the air (learning) to happen.

So, when are these Windows of Opportunity open and how will you know?

The easiest way is by observing your baby or toddler. A newborn baby looks intently in your eyes, and also stares at high contrasting objects – this tell you the ‘window’ for Vision is open. Their brain is building neural pathways around vision. You can assist their learning by placing interesting objects close by (remembering that newborns can only see clearly for a distance of about 30cm for the first month).

Have you noticed that babies around 15 months are intrigued by opening and closing doors and drawers. This is because their Intellect is developing and they are gaining valuable brain learning about these concepts. They develop the skills quickly when the time is ripe for learning - and the ‘window’ is open.

And what about when your toddler starts climbing….. They seem to climb on, and onto anything – whether it’s stairs, chairs and even tables. They are so proud of themselves! And, they have no idea of our concerns as parents about their safety. Lots of climbing tell you that ‘window’ of Motor development is open.

Language is another – children seem to all of a sudden exploded with language – the number of words they use and the length of their sentences. Young children learn a 2nd language ‘easier’ than adults, as their ‘window of opportunity’ for Language is open, whereas by puberty it’s closed – which is why it is generally harder to learn a new language as an adult.

So, take the opportunity as you notice what your child is doing…. If they are climbing a lot, provide them with safe climbing options. If language is blossoming, then read and sing with them, teach them nursery rhymes, and utilise the time.

When the ‘windows’ are open it’s the best time for learning to occur. This is also why I encourage parents to seek support early if there are any questions about their child’s development. If their language is not developing, then the earlier you seek support the better, as the ‘window’ is still open – provided you get the support at that time.

Happy Parenting!

Motor development refers to the muscles – both large and small, in our bodies.

Gross Motor (GM) are the large muscles in our head and neck, arms and legs.

Fine Motor (FM) refers to the small muscles in your fingers, and eyes.

Children develop their muscles from top to bottom, and inner to outer. This means that babies’ muscles develop and strengthen first from the head, then torso, then legs; and from their arms and then out to their fingers.

Remember that wobbly, very heavy head when babies are first born? Gradually over the first few weeks they are more able to control their neck muscles to hold their head upright.

Children develop their muscles through opportunity to exercise them, at the appropriate time. Here’s a summary of the muscle skills they are developing, the approximate time frames for them, and how you can help them:

In the first 6 weeks they are (GM) trying to hold their head up, and will put their fist to their mouth. Their limbs have a jerky response, as they can not yet control them, and are easily startled by sudden noises and movements. FM: They may ‘track’ objects (follow them) with their eyes, but not moving the head.

You can help your baby by: Giving them opportunity for tummy time – just a few minutes, several times a day – place them facing down, hands near their shoulders with their palms down, and face turned to the side. Support your baby’s head, whenever you are holding them.

From 6 weeks to 3 ½ months, they are (GM) generally able to lift their head from side to side, when having ‘tummy time’, and use some voluntary movements such as stretching their legs. They may also bring their hands to the midline (the middle of their body). In terms of FM they unclench their fists and may use them to bat at overhead objects – eg toys hanging from a frame.

You can help your baby by: Continue tummy time with several short bursts during the day – never just after a feed, or you will have a mess to clean up! Place three colourful objects in a semi-circle in front of them, so that when they raise their head, there is something interesting to see. Or, lay baby on your chest, so that when she pushs up she sees your face to smile at. Also, lay them on their back with an overhead frame toy – where objects dangle down withing their reach, to bat at – first it will be accidental, then they will learn to deliberately strike it. Give them different toys to hold – different textures to feel.

Between 3 ½ - 5 ½ months babies learn to use their forearms to push their head and chest up (when having tummy time), and they begin to sit with support. Babies will stretch and kick their legs, and reach for objects they can see. They roll from stomach to back.

You can help your baby by: Providing tummy time, and also opportunity to sit – use pillows around them as props (supervised) or sit with your legs around them. Let them have a little bit of room to ‘sway’ as they need to practise using their core muscles to learn to balance upright – this isn’t as possible in plastic ‘chair’ supports.

By 8 months babies can often (GM) sit unsupported, and may roll or pull their bodies along using their arms (dragging their legs). They may stand, holding onto support. In terms of FM, they may transfer a toy from hand to hand, may bang two objects together and may turn the object over or around.

You can help your baby by: Lots of floor time. Ensure the floor is clean, and clear of choking hazards – any small pieces and your baby will find them!. It’s often useful to lay on the floor yourself and check out what they can see, especially under sofas. Show them how to bang objects together, and they will copy you.

Always supervise your baby whilst they play and explore.

Next week we’ll look at Motor Development from 8 months to 3 years.

Happy Parenting!